Sunday, July 25, 2010

Breaking the Big Girl Bonds

Eric and I took a hike today at Seltzer park.  He made a comment that I have heard several times before...."boy, you walk fast".  The last time that I heard this was on a 6 1/2 mile walk around Mission Hills.  Now, that time, my friend phrased it as "For someone who says that she doesn't walk alot, you sure do walk fast".  I think she was actually thinking something else....something akin to "for a big girl, you sure do move quicker than I would think you could!".  She's a good friend though, so I appreciate her choice of wording!  I DO walk fast.   I explained to her that whenever we get started on a walk, I am only thinking of one thing....when will we be done?  I am like a horse charging towards the stables....although I begin my charge from the moment that we start.  I decided not to even try changing it.  It seems to be working for me.

I break one other big girl fallacy....I actually do have some rhythm.  I know I have said that I am true to my Kentucky roots but I actually can find the beat in a song.  I've had people gasp in amazement that I can stay in time to music....I can only think that people think when you gain weight, you loose all sense of balance.  I won't argue that fact since we all know that I fell in the hallway a few weeks ago.  I think, overall, however, that my size 10 feet help the balance thing alot.  Either way, I can actually keep time and it's kind of enjoyable to see everyones surprise when the music is playing.  Now, I won't say that it's pretty...just in time with the music. 

This was my revelation during my hike - that we all have preconceived notions of how people should act.  Fat people should be slow and have no rhythm.  Thin people should be fast and be able to dance up a storm.  In then end, we are all still who we are, regardless of what our outside looks like.  I think that brings me comfort.  I think many times I am trying to fit into a mold of what I think others are expecting....and in the end, I don't think anyone else actually even cares! 

There are so many things that I am holding off of in life because of my weight.  I want to go skydiving and go on the Zip line at the Wild Animal Park.  I am thinking that dropping a few pounds may make both of these activities safer and more enjoyable.  Since skydiving for beginners is only done in tandem, I am not relishing the idea of being strapped to some 150 pound guy that is crossing himself and wondering  "Why me?"  I'm sure also, that we would fall like a rock and the trip may be a bit slower if I was a bit smaller.  But.....how long do I wait?  How much more do I miss?  I don't even go swimming anymore because I hate getting into a swimsuit.  Several summers have come and gone and I haven't been to a beach or anywhere where I would be expected to be in swimwear.  Maybe it's time to let go, still work on my weight, but not let it consume my life so much. 

Let me know your thoughts.  Loree and I are planning on doing the Zip line in August.  I am hoping that they don't weigh you first....but I also know that I don't want to "weight" anymore.  Life is short.  I had a friend pass away a few weeks ago and I learned several things from his passing.  The most important one was...Don't waste time...He never seemed to waste any time on anger, regret or feeling sorry for himself.  He died of very painful pancreatic cancer and was making jokes up until the last days of his life.  How cool is that?

I leave you with a quote from Erma Bombeck.  "Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming—Wow!—What a ride!"...zip line, here I come!

Love to you all!

3 comments:

  1. I love this one for MANY reasons. I can relate to this completely (walking fast to get it over with is a BIGGY!!). I ALSO have rhythm (I'm a water aerobics teacher), and size 10 feet. I say (though I'm too chicken to do it myself). GO FOR IT! Life IS too short--don't wait. We are related--I'm quite sure! ;-)

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  2. Ok, I am not sure if you are crediting the quote to me or not. But let me just say that you do walk fast, for any size person. All I ever see when we are walking is your back side.
    (cause you are always leading) Thats all I'm saying.
    I think we all learned alot from Steve's memorial. No regrets & live life to the full every day. Zip Line here we come!!!
    Love you lots, Loree

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  3. I went zip lining last summer and no, they didn't weigh me first (I'm sure we are very close in size) and yes, it was one of the most fun things that I have done. We were in Lake Tahoe and I only wish that it could have been a longer ride. Enjoy the ride, Enjoy life!!!!

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